4 Steps to Find Meaning in Daily Life

4 steps to find meaning in daily life

Take a moment and consider what are the times that you felt most alive – in a lasting, meaningful way?  Chances are, it wasn’t when you bought a new pair of shoes or sat scrolling through Instagram reels. And, it probably wasn’t even after achieving a big goal.

More likely, it was during a moment of genuine connection or when you were fully present in an experience that led you to find meaning in daily life. So here we go – I’m sharing 4 steps to find meaning in daily life. Keep reading.

Wait, what about goals?

If you know me, you may be thinking: ‘Wait a second. Aren’t you the one that champions others to plan for the future and to set goals?’ Well yes, I am but let me explain why I believe that it’s the small moments and everyday choices that create a life of purpose and fulfillment.

The feedback I often get is that people get overwhelmed as they strive to achieve big goals. Sometimes to the point where they give up setting goals. But, perhaps it is the way we perceive achieving those goals that keep us unsatisfied and overwhelmed. We theorize that achievement – whether through ‘successful’ relationships, careers, homes, body image – will bring meaning and happiness to our lives.

Pause here and go back to the question I asked in the beginning: “What are the times that you felt truly alive?”  After achieving a big goal or accomplishing something you set your mind to getting?  Truth bomb here – maybe you felt a short-lived surge but more than likely, you celebrated the accomplishment in some way and then moved on to achieving the next goal.

Shifting That ‘Achievement’ Mindset

I get it.  As I was building a career and ‘adulting’, I’d set goals and achieve them. In fact, I thrived on achievement but realized that all too often, it meant always living for what was next.  I would think, “once I finish this project….” or “when I get through the busy fall season….” then I would finally have time to do what I truly wanted to do.  Don’t get me wrong – I had an uncanny ability to work hard and garner enjoyment from all of it but time would race by and I’d feel slightly unsatisfied. Something was missing.

After living like that for years, I had to shift my mindset so that amidst ticking off items on the massive task lists, I could (and must) take time to ‘smell the roses’. I dug deep to create tools to get me (and guide others) there. I looked inward and chose themes every year to root me in that mindset. Essentially, that gave my days meaning in the smallest, but most meaningful ways.  A lifestyle that I still stick to today.  And apparently, I was on to something.


The Meaning Crisis

In a Substack article by Stoic Wisdoms, reference was made to the fact that we are living in what philosophers call a “meaning crisis.” They theorize that, “Despite having more comforts and conveniences than ever before, many of us feel empty. We chase academic achievements, scroll through carefully curated social media feeds, and fill our Amazon carts, hoping each new accomplishment or purchase will finally make us feel whole.

Stoic Wisdoms quotes a study from Harvard University that followed 724 participants over 75 years, examining what truly creates a happy and meaningful life. 

The result? 

It wasn’t money, success, or fame. The participants who reported the most fulfilling lives were those who found purpose in ordinary moments and maintained deep connections with others.

Unfortunately, we are getting further and further away from that by filling our days with meaningless tasks.  We’ve created a world of endless distractions, instant gratification and carefully curated highlights of others’ lives, making our own days feel insignificant.  Relationships have become superficial exchanges – or generally ignored.

Case in point.

The other day, a young woman was having a cellphone conversation in the grocery store as she added items to her cart. It was tough to miss her during my time in the store. She wandered aimlessly having a loud-ish conversation (as people tend to do when talking on their cellphones in public), actually complaining to her friend how bored she is with life.

A few minutes later, she seemed flustered at the checkout counter. Holding her phone in one hand, she handed items she didn’t actually want back to the checkout clerk.

A line-up was growing behind her as she sorted it out. Making excuses with negative self-talk as she explained to the clerk that she was rather ‘daft’ today. Derailing the rhythm of others as they mindfully went through the task of getting groceries. All the time, with her friend on the other end of the line waiting for her attention.

What did she miss during her shopping experience?  Friendly gestures with those around her. A lovely interaction at the deli counter as a child told her mother a funny story. Making thoughtful decisions about the products she was buying. Not to mention having good manners as she reached in front of another customer to grab a container of yogurt, with nary an ‘excuse me’.

Creating Meaning in Everyday Experiences

You see, meaning comes from how we approach our everyday experiences. Making small choices to be present and to connect creates a web of meaning that gives our days purpose.  Meaning isn’t something we find – it’s something we create through how we choose to engage with our daily lives.

It might seem like a bit of a leap when comparing grocery shopping to this but, even mundane tasks can become meaningful when we connect them to our values and the impact they have on others. 

The secret to finding meaning isn’t in changing what we do – it’s in changing HOW we do it. It’s about bringing awareness and intention to our daily actions and interactions. And, the key is to identify what genuinely resonates with you and make space for it in your daily life.

4 Steps to Find Meaning in Daily Life

Certainly, people find meaning from different things but here are 4 steps to find meaning in daily life.

  • SET INTENTIONS: Ask yourself, “How can I bring more meaning to one ordinary moment today?”  Be specific here.  Where will you practice being more engaged?
  • BE PRESENT: Presence creates purpose so practice truly being present. When we’re fully present in what we’re doing – whether it’s cooking, watering the plants, having a conversation with a stranger –  we create space for meaning to emerge into our day.
  • CONNECTION:  Who can you create meaningful connection with? We are becoming an insular society so take time to reach out to people. Even acknowledging strangers. Or, send someone a card to tell them you’re thinking of them.  Drop off a sweet treat to someone that you have lost touch with.
  • REFLECTION: At the end of your day, contemplate one small moment that felt meaningful and the reason it stood out.  How can you create more moments like that?

Stop and Smell the Flowers

You’ve heard the saying, ‘stop and smell the flowers’, right?  Well, it simply means to rediscover the beauty in small gestures and to surprise yourself with how little it can take to be happy. To notice all that is around you. To take time and make time for the things that give you meaning. 

And, what if the real meaning is right in front of you? What if it is in the ordinary moments we rush past every day?

Meaning doesn’t just happen to us.  It is created through our choices and attention.  Beyond, the above noted 4 steps to find meaning in daily life, simply look around and you’ll see an abundance of opportunities. Buy those flowers for yourself. Stop and look up at the scenery. Give a task your full focus. Turn off your phone. Smile at the random stranger in the store and hold the door open for people. Say thank you. You will be surprised how close it all is if you are open to noticing what’s right in front of you.

Care to share? What is one thing you did today that made a small moment meaningful?


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